by Sally Rosa | Dec 17, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Body Image / Eating Disorders
Is Being Skinny Everything?
You can’t turn on your TV, check your email, or go on Facebook and Instagram without being bombarded by the message that skinny is everything. In today’s world, we’re constantly, and I mean constantly, told that less pounds = more attention, self-confidence, and self-esteem.
Are these messages true, though? Does a smaller waistline really solve all our problems? It should come as no surprise that I think this is a bunch of baloney. Not only do I think it’s BS, but I think a lot of people agree with me
Is this hot?
To prove my point, and to set the record straight on what men and women really like, I interviewed my friends. I talked to guys and girls about what they find attractive. I even asked a couple of strangers their thoughts on skinny.
What they have to say may just surprise you!
What Men Find Attractive
I asked three guys I know, and one random stranger, what they find attractive. I also asked them why they think being skinny is perceived as so important.
J: I like women with self-confidence. Yeah looks are important obviously, but the way they carry themselves is more important. Like if I meet a girl and it’s obvious she’s insecure about herself, I’m less attracted to her. Or if she’s always asking if she looks hot, or if I’m attracted to her, I’m going to like her less. Is that messed up?
I think women put so much importance on being skinny because…it’s like a self-fulfilling prophecy. They’re told that there’s nothing more important than being skinny so much they believe it. Then being skinny is all they care about and they start spreading the “message” of skinny to other women. It’s a circle.
A: I think girls who look healthy are hot. It’s weird too, ‘cause girls can be skinny and healthy and large and healthy. For me it’s all about health. Maybe ‘cause I’m in the gym so much. I don’t know. If a girl’s ribs are poking out and it’s obvious she hasn’t eaten in like a week, I just don’t find that attractive.
Being skinny is important to women because it’s all they hear. Have you ever looked at the magazines next to the register at Publix? It’s “how to lose ten pounds,” or “do this to look good in a bikini.” Of course girls are going to want to be skinny ‘cause it’s all they know.
B: It’s kind of hard to say. I mean I definitely like skinny girls, but I like girls with a little meat on their bones too. Should I not say that? I like all kinds of girls is what I mean. Definitely though there are girls who are too skinny or weigh too much. I guess I like normal girls. Skinny, fat, whatever.
It’s definitely society’s fault girls think being skinny is so important. There are entire channels, sites, Facebook groups, whatever, just dedicated to how to lose weight. That seems kind of messed up.
Stranger: I like women who are a bit bigger. You know how supermodels look like toothpicks? I’m just not into that. It’s fine if women want to try and be that, but it’s just not my thing.
I think women make being skinny the most important thing because of society and culture. That skinny supermodel look is all you see everywhere. That’s what girls see when they’re young and that’s what they grow up believing. It’s pretty sick actually. It’s like that for guys too. Not in the same extreme way, but it exists.
What Women Find Attractive
I asked two women, and another stranger(!), the same questions.
H:Being skinny is attractive for sure, but so is being large or bigger or whatever you want to call it. Being healthy is attractive and you can be healthy when you’re skinny or when you’re big. Most men and women think skinny is hotter than being normal sized or bigger and I guess that’s true a lot of the time, but not always.
It’s definitely about how the media portrays women. It pisses me off whenever I think about it and I think about it a lot. Seriously go on any site and the models never look like me. Not that I think I’m fat but I’m not model skinny. Go to Forever 21 right now on your phone. What do you see?
C: Skinny is definitely attractive. It just looks good. I feel better when I’m skinnier. I have that confidence, guys look at me more, and like I know it’s messed up, but that’s just how it is. You don’t have to be skinny to be hot but it definitely helps.
I don’t know really why being skinny is so important. Probably it has to do with how I was raised. It’s probably like that for a lot of girls. My mom would tell to watch my weight or boys wouldn’t like me. And look at TV. Aside from Kim [Kardashian] there’s like no big women. Jennifer Lawrence always says how fat she is, but that’s not true. She’s pretty normal.
Stranger: I feel more attractive when I’m skinny, but I don’t know how much guys like that. I dated a guy who always told me to gain weight [laughs]. That was a weird relationship. But yeah, being skinny is important to me. It’s important to every woman. Think about it, no one tells you to be fat but they always tell you to be skinny.
It’s our culture that makes being skinny so important. Like what I said a minute ago, people are always telling you to lose weight. It doesn’t matter how little you weigh, you’re always persuaded to weigh less. It’s on TV, movies, the internet, social media…everywhere. If we can change that then being skinny probably wouldn’t be important to so many women.
by Fiona Stockard | May 28, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Body Image / Eating Disorders
Written By: Katie Schipper
Eating Disorders are incredibly dangerous and deeply misunderstood diseases. They claim the lives of every gender, religion, social class, age group, culture, and race. There’s no one who’s immune to an eating disorder, just like there’s no one who’s immune to addiction. The idea that eating disorders are a choice was discussed in Part I. In Part II, we’ll talk about the common misconception that eating disorders are reserved for white, privileged women.
Misconception: Eating Disorders Only Affect White Adolescent Girls from Wealthy Families
The idea that someone chooses to have an eating disorder and therefore, should easily be able to stop, is pretty dangerous. Equally as dangerous is the idea that only rich, white girls suffer from eating disorders. The danger, of course, lies in the fact that this leaves out thousands and thousands of men and women who suffer from eating disorders. This is like assuming a crack addict must be a black man from the inner city. These types of myths help perpetuate deadly misinformation.
First things first, there are reasons this misconception has gained so much momentum. Like most lies, it started out with a kernel of truth. Eating disorders usually (usually, not always) develop in the early teens. Based on current research, women tend to be at a higher risk for developing eating disorders. That’s pretty much it for the true part. The reality, as always, is much more complicated and covers much more ground.
Get an expert’s option on eating disorders
Many More Are At Risk
Women aren’t the only group at a higher risk for developing an eating disorder. Other groups include: people who engage in certain sports, those who experience acute stress, those who experience intense stress, and those with other mental or physical illnesses (including addiction). Even these groupings shouldn’t overshadow the much more vital truth – anyone is at risk. Eating disorders can occur at any age, in any income family, to any gender identity, to any race…the list goes on and on.
Do you know the warning signs of Anorexia?
Taking It Too Far
Another trait shared between eating disorders and addiction is the idea that individuals have an imaginary “line” they cross. This means that what may start as just a diet, or an attempt to lose a little weight, can develop into an eating disorder. The same can be said of what initially may be just comfort food or the occasional overindulgence. What might start as small changes in behaviors and habits can easily (and quickly) develop into something very dangerous. Unfortunately, as is true with addiction, by the time someone notices these changes, the line has often already been crossed.
Dispelling lies and misinformation is essential for eating disorder treatment and recovery. The more accurate information that’s spread, the more likely under-representing groups will be to seek and receive help. To believe that any group is exempt from developing an eating disorder is to deny them the chance to recover.
by Fiona Stockard | May 19, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Body Image / Eating Disorders
Written By: Katie Schipper
Misconceptions About Eating Disorders
Like addiction and alcoholism, eating disorders are a vastly misunderstood disease. The mental, emotional, spiritual and physical anguish that accompany an active eating disorder is immense. Also like alcoholism, the obsessive thinking and pathological devotion to protecting the disease are such that outsiders often resort to blaming the individual – this makes it easier for loved ones to swallow. Over a series of articles, we’ll look at common misconceptions about eating disorders. Dismantling myths is a vital step towards the future of eating disorder treatment.
Misconception: Eating Disorders Are a Choice
Perhaps the most dangerous of myth about eating disorders is that the suffering individual choses their condition. While initially there may be behaviors that were chosen, there comes a point where the person’s power of choice vanishes. Dieting and exercise are no longer about losing weight. They’ve become a compulsion and addiction. They lead to still more dangerous habits, including: laxative abuse, purging, and abusing diet pills of all shapes and forms.
The same can be said for those who suffer from binge eating and compulsive over eating. What initially begins as comfort, soon takes on a dangerous life of its own. Consumption is no longer a choice.
The parallels to addiction are impossible to ignore. Like an alcoholic with a bottle of booze, or an addict with a pipe, all choice is lost. All control vanishes from the individual suffering from an eating disorder.
How can I recover from eating disorders?
Eating Disorders Can Be Deadly
If untreated, eating disorders are fatal. They carry a higher mortality rate than addiction and alcoholism. In fact, eating disorders are the deadliest mental illness.
Again, like addiction, the paths that lead to eating disorders are varied. They usually involve a combination of both genetics (nature) and the environment someone was raised in (nurture). There’s rarely a single cause.
For many young women, the first noticeable sign of an eating disorder is poor body image. The insistence that what they look like is the end all and be all feeds into the misconception that eating disorders are voluntary. Eating disorders are not about vanity. Sure, that can be the first step, the first warning sign and trigger. In the end, eating disorders have very little to do with how one looks.
How many people a year do eating disorders kill?
Eating Disorders Aren’t a Choice
While they aren’t a choice, and shouldn’t be viewed as such, recovery from eating disorders is a choice available to ALL suffering individuals. Eating disorder treatment, paired with aftercare and twelve-step involvement, is often successful.
However, long-term recovery isn’t possible by merely treating symptoms of the disease. Symptoms include those things that look like causes, i.e. the desire to be thin, or dissatisfaction with one’s body. For any hope of recovery, each case has to be faced honestly.
As with recovery from alcoholism and addiction, recovery must be an ongoing, lifelong process. It can’t be done alone. The first step in eating disorder recovery is becoming clear about the true nature of the disease – it isn’t a choice.
Where can I find eating disorder treatment?
