The Top 10 Ways to Build Your Self-Esteem

1) Gratitude


Writing a gratitude list everyday can be rewarding. Sometimes, in early-sobriety we’re unaware of the good things in our life. The more you write what you’re grateful for, the more you’ll be grateful for it!

2) Speak Up and Sit in the Front

It’s important to contribute and participate in meetings. Sitting in the front row is one easy way to make yourself more engaged. Other members will start to notice and reach out to you. This’ll happen even more if you begin to share! Sharing and letting others know what you’re going through helps.

3) Exercise

Build Self-Esteem

Exercise is important to physical and mental health. It helps with stress relief and is a great way to relieve anxiety. Feeling healthy and fit will boost your self-esteem, guaranteed.

Start by setting small goals so you’re not overwhelmed. After awhile, you’ll notice you can do more and more.

4) Do Something for Someone

Doing small things for people helps you feel better about yourself. My sponsor is fond of saying that if you want self-esteem, you need to do esteem-able acts. Some great examples are:

  • Listening to someone
  • Asking someone what you can help them with
  • Smiling at a stranger
  • Praying for someone

5) Say an Affirmation

An affirmation is when you practice positive thinking and self-confidence by saying nice things about yourself. Having a positive attitude about your life produces feelings of self-worth and confidence. Examples of affirmations include:

  • I’m beautiful, healthy, brilliant, and tranquil
  • I’m guided by spirit who leads me towards what I must know and do
  • I’m courageous and I stand up for myself
  • Today, I abandon my old habits and take up positive ones

6) Become a Productive Member of Society

Self-Esteem in Sobriety

Having a job and being a productive builds self-esteem. Simple as that. In active addiction, most addicts were unable to keep a job. Feeling like you’re needed somewhere, and having somewhere to be throughout the week, is fulfilling.

7)Do Service Work

Doing service work is a great contribution to AA or NA and a great way to meet others. Service can include:

  • Making coffee
  • Setting up chairs
  • Giving rides to and from meetings
  • Sponsoring others
  • Speaking and chairing

8) Replace “I Should Have” With “I Will”

Listening to others and following through with action show others your willingness. It also produces a feeling of accomplishment and self-esteem. Knowing that you’re doing the right thing and following suggestions will make you, and others, proud!

9) Build a Support Network

Self Esteem

Going to meetings and related events is a great way to meet people. Giving out your number (remember, women with women and men with men!) is a surefire way to reach out. Getting to know your fellow addicts and alcoholics allows you to confide in others with issues going on, help with daily life, and have fun!

10) Take Inventory Each Day

Doing a personal inventory is SO important! Every night, before you go to sleep (or even throughout the day) reflect for a minute about your emotions and what’s going on inside. This helps you realize your motives, fears, positive attributes, and negative attributes. This allows you to reflect and do better tomorrow.

Taking a daily inventory also gives you the¬†opportunity to make amends. Here’s a list of helpful questions to ask while doing an inventory:

  • How was I resentful?
  • How was I selfish?
  • How was I afraid?
  • Do I owe an apology?
  • Was I unkind?
  • What could I have done better?
  • What can I do for others?
  • Who did I help?
  • What did I accomplish?
  • What am I grateful for?
  • Who needs my prayers?

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