Brett Rossi’s Overdose
Okay, Charlie Sheen didn’t kill his ex-fiancée Brett Rossi, but their unhealthy relationship may have contributed to her recent overdose.
This past weekend, Rossi, whose real name is Scottine Ross, was rushed to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. She had reportedly overdosed on an unknown substance.
Thankfully, Rossi recovered and is no longer in critical condition.
Her overdose got me thinking about relationships in active addiction. Lord knows I’ve had enough of them!
How do relationships in active addiction impact addiction? How do these relationships fuel the flames of destructive behavior? And the million dollar question – is it possible to really love your significant other while in active addiction?
Dating in Active Addiction
I was actively drinking and drugging for seven years. During that time, I dated more than my fair share of guys, most of who were also drinking and drugging. There were a few unfortunate “normies” thrown in there. Luckily, I’ve been able to make amends to them in sobriety!
So, how did these relationships impact my addiction? Well, they fueled it. Having someone to cosign all of my insanity kept me drinking and drugging for longer than I should have. Having someone by my side, who was just as crazy as I was, made my behavior feel normal.
Not to mention, two addicts can scheme, plot, and scam better than one. My partner in crime, whoever that happened to be at the time, and I would create some sort of weird addict synergy. This also kept me drinking and drugging for longer than I would have otherwise.
That’s my experience, but what about other types of destructive relationships? What about codependency, abusiveness, and general unhealthy behavior?
Well, these are all common to relationships in active addiction. After all, addiction and codependency go hand-in-hand. In active addiction, we’re not only physically, mentally, and spirituality sick, but emotionally sick as well. Having someone around to make us feel loved is huge. That’s been my experience, anyway.
Abusive relationships also go hand-in-hand with active addiction. I know countless boyfriends verbally abused me during my addiction. Thank God I was never physically or sexually abused, though I know that’s common for many female addicts.
As for general unhealthy behavior, that almost goes without saying.
Can Two Active Addicts Love Each Other?
I wish there was a simple answer to this question. Unfortunately, like a lot of factors involved in addiction, there’s no simple answer.
I think it’s possible for two active addicts to truly love each other. I also think it’s possible for two people who love each other to engage in destructive behavior together.
I know I loved at least one of the guys I dated in active addiction. That didn’t stop us from pulling each other down. Love didn’t stop us from hurting each other on an emotional, mental, and spiritual level.
So, what’s the solution to destructive relationships in active addiction? Simple. We get sober! If our significant others love us, they’ll support this decision. If our significant others really love us, they’ll follow suite and make some major changes in their lives too.