by Sally Rosa | Mar 24, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Sobriety For Women
Why Do Women In Recovery Relapse?
Relapse is too often a part of women’s recovery stories. This doesn’t have to be the case though! It’s possible for addicts to go a lifetime without relapsing!
Even if a woman in recovery does relapse, hope isn’t lost. In fact, valuable lessons can be learned after relapsing! We can take our slip and turn it into a stronger, more vigorous, program of spiritual action!
1) Stress
While we’re in our active addictions, we’re usually using or drinking to suppress negative emotions. One of these is stress. Raise your hand if you like stress. I don’t see any hands!
Early recovery isn’t easy. Staying sober is overwhelming. Finding and keeping a job is overwhelming. Making sober friends is overwhelming. Life is overwhelming! Working a strong recovery program (aka being spiritually fit) provides us with the foundation and support network we need. Without this support, it’s easy to deal with stress in negative, harmful ways.
2) Not Changing People, Places, and Things
People– Being surrounded by old friends isn’t healthy. They may remind you of old habits, be negative towards your recovery, or just generally be assh**es. Hanging around old people is one of the easiest ways to justify a relapse. “Everyone else is drinking, why can’t I?,” you might ask yourself. To put it another way, people can change our motives and early-recovery is all about motives.
Places – Many women try to get sober in the same area they used in. This usually doesn’t work too well. It’s hard to stay sober when you know you can get high within five minutes. In early-recovery, it’s important to stay away from places that trigger strong thoughts of using.
Things – Getting rid of anything that reminds us of drinking or getting high is key! Holding onto paraphernalia and objects associated with active addiction isn’t a good idea. Imagine if someone kept a crack pipe with them during early-recovery. They’d probably end up smoking crack. Duh!
3) Occasions
Holidays, celebrations, and family get-togethers are some of the happiest occasions around. However, for addicts in early-recovery, they can be tough to get through sober. I know I’ve been guilty of thinking “you mean I can’t drink on my wedding day? What kind of crap is this!”
Holidays and celebrations require a strong support system to get through. Without people to talk to, without an active spiritual connection, it’s easy to justify one glass of wine. We all know what just one glass of wine leads to!
Then there are funerals. Funerals are stressful, emotionally challenging, and plain-old suck! Who wants to deal with emotional pain when they could get high instead? Without an active and strong support systems, we can easily relapse into harmful behaviors.
4) Relationships
In early-recovery, us addicts often swap addictions. Oh, you’re a pill addict? Well, now you’re codependent. I know that was true for me!
We reach for anything that makes us feel better. Getting into a relationship in early-sobriety is pretty dangerous. I mean, we hear it all the time! It’s commonly recommended to stay away from relationships (that means sex too!) until we’ve finished our steps. At that point, we’re spiritually fit and have a firm understanding on what’s appropriate and inappropriate.
One final reason to stay away from relationships in early-sobriety is that the people we seek out are usually sick. Imagine if you’re dating a boy and he relapses. It becomes that much easier to justify getting high with him.
5) Not Working a Program of Recovery
This is probably the biggest reason women, of all lengths of sobriety, relapse. Going to meetings, getting a sponsor, working the twelve-steps, and sponsoring other women, is a vital part of recovery. Hell, that is recovery!
Graduating a women’s treatment center is also pretty important. Us addicts are good at staring things, but pretty lousy at finishing them. Let’s finish something!
Going to treatment and working a program of recovery is what keeps women sober. Without these things, we’re often miserable and depressed, which makes getting high look like a pretty good option.
Although relapse in a part of many women’s stories, it doesn’t have to be! If you do relapse, hopefully you’ll learn some valuable lessons and make it back to the rooms of recovery. To avoid relapse, shut up and listen to the women who came before you! Take a few suggestions and grow into a woman of grace and dignity!
by Fiona Stockard | Mar 21, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Sobriety For Women
How Do I Handle Anxiety Without Drugs?
Anxiety is a normal human emotion that everyone experiences. In fact, it’s almost impossible not to experience anxiety in real-life recovery from drugs and alcohol. When first getting sober, it’s hard to deal with everyday situations like work, school, treatment, or personal relationships. In serious cases, anxiety can interrupt a person’s ability to live a healthy life.
What Is Anxiety?
There are a few different classifications of Anxiety Disorders. The most common include:
Panic Disorder
Individuals who experience Panic Disorder become very fearful and have attacks of sudden terror. Think things like panic attacks. During a panic attack you feel chest pain, have an increased heart rate, and feel like you can’t breathe. You’ll sweat a lot (gross!).
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
Individuals with OCD have constant thoughts and fears, which force them to act in certain rituals or routines. These obsessions are like compulsions, which have to be fulfilled in order to experience relief.
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
Individuals with PTSD have experienced a traumatic event. This can take the form of sexual abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse, a near death experience, or plain old death. The individual then experiences the aftereffects of this traumatic event, which manifest in the form of fearful, racing thoughts and memories. In extreme cases of PTSD it’s recommended to look into trauma treatment.
General Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD)
Individuals with GAD or SAD suffer from excessive worry, fear, nervousness, and tension. Being in social settings can increase this anxiety. That’s been my experience. If I’m dealing with anxiety and go out with friends, I’ll end up stuck in my head wondering what others are thinking of me.
What Are Signs of Anxiety?
- Shortness of Breath
- Hyperventilation
- Increased Heart Rate
- Sweating
- Nausea
- Dizziness
- Insomnia
- Clammy Hands
- Obsessive Thoughts
- Ritual Behaviors
- Nightmares and Night-Terrors
- Fear
- Upset Stomach
- Meditation and Deep-Breathing
- Prayer
- Yoga
- Positive Affirmations
- Exercise
- Acceptance
- Find a Distraction
- Sleep
- Reach Out For Help
- Talk to Your Sponsor/Therapist/Sober Supports
- Utilize a Personal Interest (Reading, Journaling, Etc.)
Remember, anxiety is common for all people, especially addicts! It’s often helpful to pause, take a deep breath, and remember that you’re safe in the moment. If you need professional help, there are treatment centers that deal with dual diagnosis. This is when substance abuse is linked with a mental health issue.
by Sally Rosa | Mar 20, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Recovery
Am I Ready To Move From My Halfway House?
As a women in recovery, becoming a productive member of society and growing into a self-supporting human being is important! A Halfway House, or sober-living home, is a safe and structured environment for us in early-sobriety. Deciding when to move out of a halfway house can be stressful!
Here are some questions (and answers!) to help point you in the right direction.
1) Have You Completed The Twelve-Steps?
If you’re in a twelve-step program, completing the steps is the first thing you should do. Wait, I lied. Getting a sponsor is the first thing you should do. After all, you can’t work the steps without a sponsor!
Working the twelve-steps is the main goal of early-recovery. Afterwards, you get to cary the message and help other addicts and alcoholics.
2) Are You Moving With Roommates?
Moving out with roommates can be tricky. Make sure that whoever you move with is responsible! A good way to tell is to ask them these five questions! If you don’t want to do that, try asking some of the questions below.
-Are your potential roommates in recovery?
-Are you at risk if they’re not sober?
-What happens if they relapse while you’re living together?
-Is relapse a risk for you?
-Do they work a good program and help others?
-Are they able to pay their bills?
-Have they had a roommate before?
These are all things you should discuss before moving with anyone. Talk with your sponsor and sober supports. Maybe moving to a three fourths house is smarter than moving into an apartment. Above all, pray on it!
3) Are You Financially Stable?
Having and sticking to a budget is important to recovery. Moving out and being held financially accountable is pretty damn stressful! Add that to all the other stress and maybe you’re better off staying put (at least for a little while!).
Make sure that you’ve mapped out a secure budget and gone over it with someone experienced.
4) Are You Being Honest With Yourself?
Though this probably seems like a hard question to answer, it’s as easy as asking yourself two questions.
-What’re my motives?
-Do I have any reservations?
If your motives are genuine and you’re trying to progress in your life, then it might be time. However, if you have any reservations, it’s not the best time to move and you should probably wait (duh!).
5) What Do Other Sober Women Say?
Ask your sponsor, peers, family, sober supports, and halfway house managers what they think. If you’re doing the right thing, they’ll be encouraging and excited for you to move on. If they suggestion staying longer, then you should follow their suggestions. Those closest to you see you day in and day out. They’ll be able to tell if you’re ready to move or not.
Read testimonials about living in a Sober Living environment!
by A Women in Sobriety | Mar 19, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Sobriety For Women
Delray Beach is The Recovery Capital of The World!
Delray Beach, Florida, is known as the recovery capital of the United States. It’s also knows as the recovery capital of the world! It’s located in Palm Beach County, in beautiful south Florida. Delray is an hour north of Miami and only twenty minutes from Ft. Lauderdale. It lies between Boca Raton and Boynton Beach.
I have a saying I like to repeat to women new in Delray Beach. It goes a little something like this – my grandparents worked their entire lives to retire to Delray Beach. All I had to do was lie, cheat, steal, and drink!
Why is Delray The Recovery Capital?
Delray Beach has the country’s largest amount of sober communities, treatment centers, halfway houses, and other sober living facilities. There are over 200 weekly twelve-step meetings to choose from, many of which are women’s meetings.
As if all that wasn’t enough, Delray has a number of recovery business. These range from twelve-step intergroup offices to meditation centers to yoga studies to spiritual shops.
Why Is it a Good Idea For Me To Live in Delray?
Recovery for women can be hard, especially when surrounded by the people, places, and things we associate with active addiction. Getting away from these places can be a tremendous help in the recovery process. Being around other recovering women, who share your struggles and triumphs, is a great form of sober support. Being part of an active community of sober women can make you feel accepted and comfortable through the difficult time known as early-sobriety. It also helps with preventing relapse.
Delray is diverse and boasts a demographic of all ages. Young people (eighteen to twenty five years old) are quickly becoming the largest group admitted to treatment centers. Delray beach has a ton of young people in sobriety! It’s easy to make new friends, supports, and meaningful, lifelong connections. Some of us refer to these people as our second family! Delray is also know for it’s old-timers. These are people who have long-term recovery and (guess what!) they don’t have to be old! They have an incredible amount of experience, strength, and hope, which they’ve gained over their time in the rooms of recovery.
While some people stay in Florida to fulfill their treatment and return home, approximately 65,000 people make it their home after treatment.
Testimonial articles about Delray Beach, FL, have been found in the NY Times and the Herald Tribune.
Can I Have Fun in Sobriety?
Delray Beach is known for being a popular vacation spot. Many love the beautiful scenery at night, which, for many women, is great place to meditate.
Delray boasts over thirty parks and recreation facilities for residents and visitors. These include pools, water parks, athletic fields, skate parks, and one and half miles of public beach. Guess what else? The beach is open and beautiful three hundred and sixty-five days a year!
Downtown Delray is known for its dining, shopping, arts, culture, and nightlife. It’s filled with great restaurants, retail stores, spas, salons, art galleries, and unlimited fun. Downtown Delray’s known for its arts and crafts festivals and Christmas Tree lighting festival. Delray is also right next to the PGA Tour headquarters, markets, and countless concert venues.
Delray Beach is a fantastic place to start your recovery journey. No wonder is has been dubbed the Recovery Capital of the World! No wonder it’s become a home for so many women in sobriety!
by Sally Rosa | Mar 18, 2014 | Addiction Articles, Sobriety For Women
Why Go To An All Women’s Treatment Center?
Laura suffers from heroin addiction and an eating disorder. She goes to a traditional treatment center and is placed in a male therapist’s caseload. Not only does her therapist have no experience with treating eating disorders, but he’s a guy! He also has thirty people in his caseload, including males. What happens?
If you guessed that Laura opens up a tiny bit, and only a tiny bit, you’d be right!
See, Laura talks about some basic topics. She talks about things like triggers and her insomnia. Because her therapist has no experience with eating disorders, she can get away with acting out. Her quickly dwindling weight goes unnoticed. Also, because of the men in her caseload, Laura never feels comfortable opening up about the trauma, guilt, and shame from her past. She does her thirty days, gets out, and relapses within a week.
This scenario happens everyday in treatment centers across the country. There’s a huge need for women’s addiction treatment.
There are like a thousand reasons why it’s beneficial for women to go to an all women’s treatment center. If we talked about all of them, we’d be here until next Wednesday. Let’s look at the top three.
The Top Three Reasons To Go To a All Women’s Treatment Center
1) Gender Specific Treatment
Addiction is a vicious disease that affects individuals differently, especially women. Women have a difficult time finding a treatment center that’s designed specifically for them, with gender unique therapists and groups. Women’s issues, like co-dependency, eating disorders, domestic violence, abortions, and trauma often get swept under the rug at traditional rehabs. I know I didn’t feel comfortable talking about my history of guilt and shame with guys in the room!
Drug Rehabs that have a comprehensive clinical program specifically tailored to women, it’s easy for the women to feel comfortable and work on our core and underlying issues.
2) Comfortability
There is often a huge discrepancy in what men and women look for while going to treatment. Women often need to feel more comfortable at their treatment center. They need to feel like they’re in a “home away from home.”
Drug Rehabs designed to make a woman as comfortable as possible make the recovery process easier on the woman away from her family and loved ones.
3) Less Distractions
A huge plus for women seeking treatment at an all women’s treatment center is that there are fewer distractions. Often, women tend to act out in early-sobriety. This commonly takes the form of getting into an unhealthy relationship. Getting rid of a common distraction leads to higher success rates!
When looking for an all women’s treatment center, find one that’s individualized and offers specific client-centered services. Recovery from addiction, as well as eating disorders, is difficult! With a strong and caring clinical staff, we promise to provide the structure and support women in recovery need to achieve success!
