by Sally Rosa | Feb 2, 2017 | Addiction Articles, Addiction Treatment, Blog
Alcohol Issues Plagued The life Of A Talented Dancer
At age 13 Meaghan got a job at the local diner because she wanted money to go to the movies. Her brothers and sisters all older than her just asked their parents for money, but not Meaghan. She would pedal her bike down to the upstate NY diner everyday after school and she loved it. At age 16 Meaghan’s dance life really took off. Many including the local press at the time called her the best dancer in the tri-state area. Meaghan appeared on the Today, danced at Disney and was headed to the Julliard School. Then, one night rehearsal she went out to the bars with her friends for the first time. Life for Meaghan never included a social aspect, it was the diner and dance, day after day, so the very minute that shot of whisky hit her mouth Meaghan’s alcohol issues began.
From The “Today Show” To Alcohol Detox Program
Meaghan’s drinking became an everyday affair. She would go to the bar next to the Dance studio every night after rehearsal. Sidelines on Grand Ave. had always been there. She just never noticed it ‘til now. That on establishment would supply Meaghan with enough alcohol to destroy everything she had been work for since the age of 13. Her alcohol issues became more frequent and severe. Her practice sessions grew shorter and shorter in length. She lost so much weight she was put on dietary supplements. The whole town was pulling for her as they all prepared for Julliard audition. Noticing it all slipping away Meaghan took her alcohol issues in to her own hands and decided to stop drinking cold turkey and focus on the biggest audition of her life. The Alcohol had other plans. She woke up in an alcohol detox program at noon on Monday November 11th.
Alcohol Issues Were Not Meaghan’s Only Issues
Meaghan went into cardiac arrest at Lourdes Medical Center in Binghamton NY. The withdrawal symptoms from her alcohol issues shut down her body. The doctors at the alcohol detox program were shocked at how quickly her body had deteriorated. Once recognized as one of the most physically fit women in the state, Meaghan was no just a shell of the woman who had appeared on the Today show. Meaghan’ personality had also changed. Once a delightful and humble kind young woman she now screamed at her fellow dancers and took to hate speech on Facebook.
Words from Her Grandma Made Recovery Possible
Late on her final night in her alcohol detox program Meaghan heard the door crack open and saw her Grandmother walk inside. She reached out for Grandmother and felt the shame and guilt spread though her veins. Her Grandma stayed with her most of the night and as she left she told Meaghan to get back up on her feet and passed on a little advice her own mother had given her many years ago before she left Ireland for The United States.
‘If you stumble, make it part of the dance.”
Dancing to “Hallelujah” performed by Jeff Buckley 4 months sober, Meaghan took the pain of her alcohol issues and poured them into her audition. If you’re looking for her, stop by the Julliard School.
by Sally Rosa | Jan 27, 2017 | 12 Steps, Addiction Articles, Addiction Treatment
Help Me Find Recovery from Addiction to The Bachelor
Hi, my name is Sally and I’m addicted to The Bachelor on ABC. I’m writing to you all today hoping to find recovery from addiction to this deadly and morally corrupt reality show. I first started watching The Bachelor on ABC during Kaitlyn’s season. You know, the one where the cute and spunky Canadian was obviously going to choose Shawn Booth no matter what, until serial attention whore Nick Viall (Yup, Pronounced Vile) showed up for his second of what would be 4 appearances on ABC’s hit and soul crushing series.
Many of you Bach heads probably think I’m not that into it since I started watching during Kaitlyn’s season, but don’t worry I went back and caught up because, in this addiction, Netflix is my dealer and provides hours of backlogged roses and tears while I twitch, itch, sweat and wait for the clock to strike 8pm on Monday, so I can find out who deserves to be trampled on by Nick Viall next. This week it was Liz, kind of felt bad for her, because she got sent home simply for having sex with Nick 6 months ago and Nick of all people claimed she was just in it for the attention. I felt bad but then I didn’t because if you choose to actually go on this show, you’re sicker than I am… Maybe.
Drug Use and Watching the Bachelor on ABC are 100% the Same Thing
So here is my problem, beside the only words Nick Vialle know how to say being, “Ok” “Hey” and “Did You Have Fun”. I realized that I needed to find recovery from addiction to The Bachelor because the same patterns I played out in my addiction to heroin were being repeated every time I clicked over to watch stupid ass Chris Harrison say, “Tonight on the most dramatic episode of The Bachelor ever.” Every episode is not the most dramatic Chris Harrison! Now you really want to create the most dramatic moment in Bachelor history, have Nick give the ring to Chris Harrison. Sorry, had to get that out. Here’s the deal, my drug use consumed me. I had to have heroin and at the same time I hated it. It called to me, but every time I shot it in my veins I hated my self. I was angry when it was over, I wanted to die and I swore I would never waste an hour of my life ruining my mind body and soul with heroin or alcohol, but the next day I did it again. This is how I feel when I watch The Bachelor on ABC.
Recovery from Addiction to The Bachelor Will Not Be Easy
I’ve tried to stop before. When it was apparent that JoJo Fletcher was, as expected going to choose Quarterback of the douche squad Jordan Rodgers just because he has a famous brother, I stopped watching. I bothered me each Monday night that I wasn’t by the TV, in fact I started reading in the garage so I wasn’t tempted. Then this season when Nick Vialle was announced as the lead on the show, I knew my recovery from addiction to The Bachelor was over. I relapsed on Bach nation hard. I started a fantasy Bachelor work pool, my boss found the sheets and reprimanded me for-spending company time on this “Horse Shit.”
Watch the Bachelor Was Ruin My Work Life
My drug use effected my work performance and now so did this stupid, addicting and horrible show. I desperately need to receive the gift of recovery from addiction to the Bachelor. The problem is, all my friends watch it and I can’t just leave all my friends? Many of my girls in Jersey say they will punch me if I ever watch the Bachelor again, but it took me 2 minutes to convince them it was ok and next thing I know I am screaming at the TV, “Of course Corinne is going to take her shirt off, that’s all Nick wants anyway!” Monday is right around the corner and I will spend all day at working obsessing about how much I hate Nick and wondering if I will be able to stay away from the TV. At this point, my drug use and this silly show are twins. Wait, remember the twins from Ben’s season? They should be the Co-Bachelorettes! That would be amazing! They would each have to choose another set of twins to marry! Yup, I’m screwed. I’ll be chasing this dragon ‘til I’m 80. The good news is in 50 years; Nick will still be single.
by A Women in Sobriety | Jan 12, 2017 | Addiction Articles, Blog, Sobriety For Women, Stories from Women in Sobriety
Submitted by Anonymous
I am a 57-year-old that actually worried I wouldn’t see 40 or wouldn’t be here to see my daughters grow up. I actually thought if I can just survive until Cass is 18 that will be ok, she can then look after Lucy who is 4 years younger.
I grew up in a pub, my Mother was a big drinker, Father not so much as you would notice and my teens years just hold memories of my Mother being drunk, only now and again…but enough for me to live in dread.
I always drank, from being a teenager I was the one who drank as much as the boys. I could always hold my drink but still carried on steadily drinking once I was married and then when I became a Mother. I didn’t drink during pregnancy because Mother Nature kicked in and took over there, making me ill.
A Visible Progression
My drinking gradually went to about 2 bottles of wine a night so still manageable. My Husband had an accident in 2000 and it changed a lot between us (he was in recovery) we stayed together but I met another man at work and boy, did he like a drink !!We got on famously and cutting a long story short we got married in 2010 and spent all out time drinking…. not sure how we held our jobs down. I previously had never drank during the day but by now, it was normal.
My two daughters were pretty horrified by our behavior and they managed to carry on with their own live because by now they were living with Sober Dad.
I had liver tests and was told by numerous Doctors to stop drinking, I lasted a month, sometimes 2 but any excuse started me back on the wine…oh, were going on holiday, oh my Dad has died.
Withering Away
Cutting to the end of this then, I had full blown ascites (swollen, fluid filled abdomen) and was almost skeletal as I just didn’t eat. We went on holiday with my Husband and his Sister/Brother in law and I had two drinks in the pub at lunchtime, then we went back to the cottage and I started vomiting blood profusely. This went on for hours as I wouldn’t let them call an ambulance and they were too far gone to be over worried. Finally, an ambulance took me to hospital at 2 in the morning and I was eventually taken into surgery to have all my bleeding veins tied up. By this time, I was bleeding from every orifice, ears, nose, eyes, back passage and was in total agony. The specialist came and told me that there was nothing more they could do and I would probably not survive another few hours. My entire family were summoned and my two daughters sat weeping at my bedside as I apologized to them for my drinking and sobbed as I knew I would never see them get married or have children of their own.
I was still here the following day and every day I had blood transfusions and more drips and fluids than you could imagine. I had 30 liters of fluid drained from my abdomen and continued to pass blood for weeks.
A Medical Medical
That was 4 years ago and I am now fit as a fiddle (nearly) weight about 3 stone more and have obviously never had a drink since nor a cigarette. I am on lifelong medication and the Doctors say they cannot believe that I lived
.
My Daughters are extremely proud of me now and I can only say that even though I knew my drinking was bad and not like other normal peoples, I never, ever thought that anything like that would happen to me. I have never really spoken in any detail about it much and people in my current job don’t even know that I don’t drink…. still too afraid of the stigma.
by A Women in Sobriety | Jan 5, 2017 | Addiction Articles, Blog, Sobriety For Women, Stories from Women in Sobriety
Submitted By Pam R
Desperately Keeping My Struggles Hidden
If you’d met me in 2003, you may have described me as an energetic, talented, mother of three beautiful daughters and wife of an excellent man. I was working as development director for the YMCA, was an accomplished member of the local running community, and was well respected as a mom, a professional, and an athlete. In truth, I was anxious, arrogant and fearful, self-medicating with alcohol, trying desperately to keep my struggles hidden. As my alcoholism slowly took control of my life, I began spiraling out of control. Ultimately, I received three DUIs within 18 months.
Planting Seeds in Jail
Desperate, empty and defeated, I finally entered treatment on April 17, 2006 – and took my first steps into sobriety. The foundation of recovery that saved my life was not built without extreme difficulty; I still faced the consequences of my DUI convictions, which included a three-month jail sentence. My program of recovery and my renewed faith sustained me, and even grew me, through that experience. When I walked out of that jail on Dec. 31, 2006, the seeds had been planted that would ultimately grow into my desire to help those fighting battles similar to mine, and to show them there is hope, there is redemption, and there is recovery.
Helping Others Every Day
Today, I serve as the Director of THP RUNS, an initiative of former NBA basketball player Chris Herren’s foundation, The Herren Project (THP). THP RUNS engages people to run, walk, and participate in healthy activities, helping each other, and others, live stronger, healthier lives. The initiative raises awareness and funding for THP’s mission, which includes providing addiction recovery resources, education and prevention initiatives across the country. I’ve relished the opportunity to run more than 65 marathons and ultra-marathons over the past 8 years, including participating in the Icebreaker Run, running across the country with 5 others to raise awareness for mental health issues and resources.
Ask and You Shall Receive
Without asking for help and finding my own recovery, none of my running success, let alone my personal or professional wellbeing, would be possible. The fact that I can work and run at all now, let alone do it while raising awareness and funding for recovery resources, is an outrageous, gift to me. Whether I’m sobbing or celebrating, my mantra is, “It is well with my soul.”
by A Women in Sobriety | Dec 30, 2016 | Addiction Articles, Blog, Sobriety For Women, Stories from Women in Sobriety
Story Submitted By Katie
A Cure for Insecurity
As a child, I remember a giant hole in me that I could never seem to fill. I wanted to be anyone else but me, so when I idolized Disney princess, Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen and later on Britney Spears, I thought I could try to fit in. I grew up in a chaotic house, my parents divorcing when I was 15 and having to go to therapist all of my teenage years. Alcoholism and drug addiction strong on both sides of the family but I took my first drink with my brother at 15 and it was magical.
All of my doubts, insecurities and fears subsided. It wasn’t long before I got my friends drinking on weekends, at football games and before school dances. College years were just as fun and I partied as hard as I studied. I was the girl who made sure I had more alcohol left when everyone else in the party ran out. I stole your alcohol and I didn’t care, the night didn’t end until the booze were Gone or I passed out with the spins.
A study came out that said I was a “binge drinker” so I went with that. After college shots got too messy, hard alcohol meant blackouts and I woke up to messages about things I did the night before. My friends thought it was hilarious so I brushed it off.
My Drinking Got Worse
Living on my own in Boston, my drinking got worse, more blackouts, more shameful nights and more apologizing. Bruises I couldn’t remember, cuts and falling down all the time. Then I got an OUI and ended up in the hospital with a concussion.
Even though I hated myself and thought it made me a horrible person I didn’t think much of it until my therapist told me that I should try having “one drink”. For months I couldn’t and I’d lie. I lost my phone twice, credit card too many times to recall and my dignity even more. Concussion #2 only 3 months later, on a long day/night of drinking left me without a job, without an internship and hopeless.
The Wisdom of Two Old Men
At this point I’m drinking almost every day and my therapist wants me to go to an AA meeting. A friend reaches out and takes me and I hear what I needed to hear from 2 old men in a church basement. My life is unmanageable because of alcohol and I can’t stop drinking.
It took me almost a month of meetings to finally stop drinking. Much to my surprise girls would call and check on me and they really wanted to know how I was doing. Getting sober was hell. I thought about alcohol all the time and wanted the suffering to end.
I got a sponsor, a home group, found a higher power and did the steps in 6 months.
The Obession has Been Removed
I am 8 months sober today and the mental obsession and physical compulsion is removed as long as I work my program. I thank my higher power every day that I am alive and grateful to be sober. At 28 years old I thought it was the end of the world, my identity for 13 years was stolen from me.
I am living proof it is not the end of the world. Sobriety is amazing and the 12 steps got me sober. I thought I was hopeless and would never have what other people have. That’s not true for me and it’s not for any woman out there struggling. You can do it too!! Just dive into the program and don’t stop. You will be amazed!
